TOAD Talk: Melanie Berner

Good morning. I would like to share three short practices for greater well-being and self-reflection: relaxing, appreciation, and gratitude, and what brings you joy?
Good morning. I would like to share three short practices for greater well-being and self-reflection: relaxing, appreciation, and gratitude, and what brings you joy?

Relaxing
Thich Nhat Hanh, who died in 2022, was a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, peace activist, teacher, author, and a major influence on Western practices of Buddhism. I had the amazing opportunity to attend a conference on Mindfulness in Education with Thich Nhat Hanh in Toronto in 2013, and he is one of my most inspirational teachers I’ve ever known. Among my favorite books that he has written is this very tiny volume titled How to Relax. You may not think you need instruction on how to relax, but I find Thich Nhat Hanh’s advice delightful - both wise and humorous.

“You don’t need to set aside special time for resting and relaxing. You don’t need a special pillow or any fancy equipment. You don’t need a whole hour. In fact, now is a very good time to relax.” 
“The first thing to do is to stop whatever else you are doing.” 

“Notice your breathing.” 

“As you breathe in, be aware that you are breathing in. As you breathe out, notice that you are breathing out.” 

Appreciation and gratitude 
Gratitude has two parts: the first is an affirmation of goodness; the second is recognizing that the source of this goodness rests outside oneself - that we receive these ‘gifts’ from other people, nature, and fate. There are many studies on gratitude: In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.

Turn to the people you are sitting next to and tell them one thing you appreciate about them.

What Brings You Joy?  

One of my favorite questions to ask my classes is “What brings you joy?” Just hearing the answers gives me so much joy. Often the things that bring us joy, when we really think about it, are small ordinary things. Things that, if we intentionally focus on, can help us cultivate joy, which is a practice. 

So, what brings you joy? Some things that bring me joy: the smell of rain, the New York Times crossword, Arlo’s laugh… What brings you joy?

The more consistently we practice, the more these become the default. Remember, we are always practicing something, whether we are aware of it or not. What will you choose to practice?

Melanie Berner is a faculty member in the English Department, advises the afternoon outdoor climbing program, and is a yoga, meditation, and mindfulness instructor. 
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